I’ve been glued to every World Cup match possible this Summer. I can’t put my finger on it exactly, but there’s a positive energy and unifying quality to it that I haven’t felt since maybe the last solar eclipse.
Between games, I even found myself Googling various players to learn more about them. Like, “Erling Haaland girlfriend,” or “Lionel Messi’s tattoos.”
Then, today, my son, Connor, sent me a viral photo of Lionel Messi’s pizza order in Miami, and it’s pretty bizarre.
If you’re among the minority of people who haven’t seen it yet, here’s the story. It’s basically pizza dough covered in dozens of tomato slices with some deliberately placed raw onions, oregano, and whole green olives. Then, there are some spices or maybe pepper in the middle. Have a look:
People’s reactions to Messi’s pizza order were quite passionate, and even angry on social media.
“Messi might be the greatest footballer of all time, but his pizza choice is up there with the worst.” – Instagram comment
Hmmm… Why would the world’s biggest soccer star have such a strange and oddly specific pizza order?
OMG, Messi’s Pizza is a Hidden Catholic Symbol!
I stared at it for maybe 30 seconds, and then it hit me. But first, have you read the DaVinci Code?
Basically, it’s the story of a symbologist, Robert Langdon, and a beautiful cryptologist who team up to solve a murder at the Louvre, racing from one clue hidden in one famous artwork to the next.
Staring at Messi’s pizza order, I suddenly felt like Robert Langdon. Look at that pizza. Those aren’t toppings, they are hidden clues, in this case, symbols of Messi’s Catholic faith.
WTF, that’s not a pizza, it’s a Jerusalem Cross! Take a second look. Rotate that pizza about 45 degrees in your mind, and you’ll see it line up perfectly:
What is a Jerusalem Cross?
The Jerusalem Cross is a Catholic symbol of Christ’s sacrifice and the spread of the Gospel from Jerusalem to the four corners of the world.
Its large central cross and four smaller crosses (olives in onions!) are also associated with the Five Wounds of Christ: the large cross is the wound in Jesus’ side, and the smaller four crosses represent the wounds in His hands and feet. (and/or the four Gospel writers, Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John).
Now, let’s overlay that cross on Messi’s pizza:
OK, by now you’re saying, this is crazy, what do you know?
I know, I’m just a dad… with an expensive Art History degree that I don’t often get to use, so please allow me to continue!
Messi’s Strong Catholic Faith
It’s well known that Lionel Messi is a man of faith. For instance, have you noticed that he makes the sign of the cross and points to heaven when he scores?
He has also been known to have Catholic priests bless his cleats before big matches.
“I thank God for giving me everything. He’s given me everything” – Lional Messi
Still not convinced? Let’s take a look at Messi’s tattoos and look for more clues:
Oh, look, it’s Jesus wearing a crown of thorns! Like the Jerusalem cross, it’s another symbol of the crucifiction, and of Messi’s strong Christian faith.
He also has other tattoos featuring Catholic imagery, including rosary beads and the stained glass rose window of the Santa Maria del Pi church in Barcelona on his right elbow.
Messi Pizza Conspiracy Theory:
Put all of this together, and what do you get?
Messi’s bizarre pizza order isn’t just your average eccentric famous person ordering something weird. Messi has a strong Catholic faith, and his pizza order could be another secret expression of that.
Let’s look at the facts of this story, starting with where the pizza was made. Messi ordered the pizza from Banchero Miami, which traces its roots back to 1932 in Buenos Aires, Argentina. It was founded by Don Agustín Banchero, who brought his pizza-making skills from Genoa, Italy, adeeply Catholic city.
Sources, like The Daily Star, report that the pizza is simply their Pizza Napolitana menu item. That may be true now, but look at photos of the Napolitana before Messi first ordered the pizza 2 years ago:
Conclusion: I believe their Pizza Napolitana was customized with Catholic symbolism for Messi. Then, after the photo went viral, Banchero began serving the Pizza Napolitana more like Messi’s order, as it was when people expected to get.
The Jerusalem cross symbolizes spreading the Gospel, so you might call this Messi’s Pizza Crusade.
Thought: Is it possible that Messi is part of a secret society, like the Illuminati, and this pizza is a clue to something much larger? Well, the Illuminati’s symbol is a goat (Baphomet), and Messi is “The GOAT”, right? Hmmm…
Does My Pizza DaVinci Code End Here?
I could keep analyzing Lionel Messi’s pizza all day, but I have to move on, as I have work to do. All of this could just be a little coldbrew coffee-fueled madness… or is it?
Is Messi’s order just a weird, Argentinian Napolitana pizza, or is it a hidden clue topped with extra symbolism?
“It’s called scotoma. The mind sees what it choses to see.” – Sir Leigh Teabing, The DaVinci Code
I have to go now. I’m buying a one-way ticket to Barcelona so that I can have a closer look at those stained glass windows in the church of Santa Maria del Pi for the next clue!
Am I crazy? Let me know what you think!